A woman starts dating a doctor. Before too long, she becomes pregnant and they don’t know what to do. About nine months later, just about the time she is going to give birth, a priest goes into the hospital for a prostate gland infection. The doctor says to the woman,
“I know what we’ll do. After I’ve operated on the priest, I’ll give the baby to him and tell him it was a miracle.”
“Do you think it will work?” she asks.
“It’s worth a try.” he says. So, the doctor delivers the baby and then operates on the priest.
After the operation he goes in to the priest and says, “Father, you’re not going to believe this.”.
“What?” asks the priest, “what happened?”.
“You gave birth to a child!”.
“But that’s impossible!” says the priest.
“I just did the operation,” insists the doctor, “it’s a miracle! Here’s your baby.”
About fifteen years go by, and the priest realises he must tell his son the truth. One day, he sits the boy down and says,
“Son, I have something to tell you. I’m not your father.” The son says,
“What do you mean, you’re not my father?” The priest replies,
“I am your mother. The archbishop is your father.”.
Bob sets up his friend Sam on a blind date with a young lady friend of his. However, Sam is a little worried about going out with someone he’s never seen before.
Sam: What do I do if she’s not good looking? I’ll be stuck with her all night.
Bob: Don’t worry, just go up to her door and meet her first. If you like what you see, then everything goes as planned. If you don’t just shout ‘Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!’ and fake an heart attack.
So that night, Sam knocks at the girl’s door and when she comes out he is thunderstruck at how attractive and sexy she is. He’s about to speak when the girl suddenly shouts: